Accepting Caregiving Role

"Choosing to deny or fight unexpected change means you will struggle all your life. Difficult though it may be, you need to acknowledge your fears, anger, grief, guilt and feelings of being alone and navigate from victim to acceptance. " 
I feel this can apply to any of life's situations. 

Dementia out of sight alone

Just got a call from my mother.
I had been with her today but she said "you're home! been out all day?"
I recounted the things we did and she replied that she felt strange, so I went over.
She opened her door and watched me walk down the hall.
After some carefully worded prodding she finally said that she felt like she was completely alone with no one near. She didn't feel right. I think she might have gotten scared about it or overwhelmingly alone.
I reassured her I was next door and how great that was.
Then turned on some music and got us some pumpkin pie, her favorite.
It must be extremely frightening to constantly forget your living situation.

Where's the Compassion?

While leaving my fathers 'retirement home' or whatever they call the fancy nursing home he's in with no nurses-
I had to use the bathroom. On the way there a staff member said to an elderly lady standing outside her door "Go sit in your chair!!" in an irritated voice.
When I came out of the bathroom I walked past the woman's room to see her sitting, head down shoulders slumped, looking depressed,
sitting in her chair......

Nutty Dementia

Sooo, while I was visiting my father
he pointed at the air conditioning vent on the ceiling.
I saw some weird looking white stuff like kleenex and Qtips hanging.
I asked what that junk was.
He told me there was a microphone up there that they listen to his conversations.
 So he sprayed shaving cream up into it.
I didn't say much in reply
I just couldn't believe he got up there without falling and cracking his head.

Why Do They Remember?

Just got back from cleaning at my mother's.
I went around the whole place with a damp rag, getting the thick dust from radiators,lampshades, dresser etc. The bathroom and kitchen floors,tub, kitchen cabinets, stove etc.
 She was watching tv and I realized that I would be exhausted and she would just be sitting there, so I said for her to vacuum.
 To my surprise she got out the vacuum and hose and pipe and set it up herself!
How can a person with zero short term memory, and most long term, remember how to do what I feel is a complicated puzzle?
I don't get it.