Thanksgiving

I went down the hall to watch the parade with mother.

My sister took my father to the diner.

At lunch I microwaved a couple of tasty turkey dinners for mom & I, she loved it.

On the weekend I roasted a chicken with all the fixin's and had family over to mom's. She was a bit confused or tired (?) Maybe it was a bit too much? Not sure, there were only the four of us and it was quiet.

 I guess at this point the person with the disease just kind of rides along with the tide that others create. 

Always Check the Refrigerator Closely

When you visit your elderly parent don't just look in and see that they have food in there. Open the containers and check the condition of it!
Milk and cottage cheese could be rotten but the closed containers look fine.
While mom was in the shower I grabbed a package of "Keep Frozen" preservative free hotdogs out of the refrigerator. They were GREY (ugh), and brought it with me to throw away. Yes, they will pick stuff out of the trash.
Another thing to check is the toaster oven temperature knob. Also the condition of the frozen dinner pans and cooking pots for signs of burnt or melting (a pot soaking in the sink or full of scouring powder etc.)
Combustible or plastic items near radiators is a good thing to check too.

Elderly Comedy Tragedy

This past week my mother made me laugh
I had left my cane at her apartment and when I knocked at her door to retrieve it
she opened the door all hunched over using the cane and acting all "crickity" It was hysterical and we had a good laugh as I called her 'granny'.

This past week my father had another fit of anger and smashed a cup in the dining-room of the home, frightening everyone. He was sent to his room. He told me he wasn't aware of ever being like that before, I replied he has been like that my whole life.

Respite? ha

A family friend emailed me monday that she was taking my mother out the next day and had already called her. Geez, if I would have known I might have planned something to be away that day. It was only by accident I saw them leave and ran down to the apartment to remove junk that mom refuses to throw away. Why don't people communicate? I know that she thinks she is doing me a favor by taking over for the day and leaving me out of it but I didn't even know that my mother had returned until she called me.
She told me that the friend had just "dropped her off" and that she made it to her apt. alone- WHAT? I find this hard to believe- must have forgotten(?)
Mother then took a nap and I tried to free my mind thinking that she was set for the day.
Nope.
She called at 4 nice and rested and wanted to go out!
uh, NO. You went to a museum and shopping!
Haven't you had enough entertainment?

Apparently not, if you can barely remember....

Caregiver Meeting

Just what I said it would be-
a room full of tables and swag.
Another room with droning microphone of Q&A.
Get a will, stay with parent in the Dr's room, get POA..
I ended up just asking the people at my table where they
would bring someone to elderly daycare and one person
answered a catholic place with nuns... My mother wouldn't
agree if she knew that, but I am willing to go look.
Needless to say, it was depressing being told once again
the things I have to get done and I came home to an antsy
mother on the phone wanting to go outside.

Dr's and beach

Well, the visit to the Dr's with mom went well.
Her bloodwork, pressure,weight, is perfect.
Her vitamin deficiency is under control.
The dr was pleased with my work on her ears.
She told me to keep trying with the 'Boniva' even if I cannot get it down her regularly-it's better than nothing.
Afterwards I took her to a small local grocery and to her delight let her wander with a basket. Then to the beach=her version of heaven.

Today, she has forgotten all that and is back to being unhappy with her life.
I am going to try and force myself to go to a caregiver conference- Damn, I do not want to- just thinking about going makes me think about skipping it. I hate conferences, all those tables of pamphlets and sitting through boring speeches.
I just want to ask someone how to deal with someone who doesn't want to DO anything and is obsessed with moving out.